Hello!!!!!!!!!!!


Thank you so much for writing for me. I love stories, and as I say every year, writing for me is like taking a communications 101 class at a no grades college. I am easier than your mom.

I like MANY THINGS, but in particular, I like people being nice to each other. I like fond mocking, capers, dudes holding babies (their own or other peoples), people rising to challenges, figuring out their sexuality, high school, fairy tales, dumb jokes, arranged marriages, soulbonds, harlequins, slash, het, gen, etc and so on to infinity.


I dislike FEW THINGS, but they are main character death, trauma that doesn't get resolved, angst for the sake of angsting, UNRELENTING GRIMNESS, vampires, werewolves, magical genderswap (this does NOT include always-a-girl aus) abuse, h/c that has more hurt than comfort.


MORE SPECIFICALLY:

An Abundance of Katherines: I am prepared for the eventuality that I will be the only one to offer/request this book but in case you are interested, I have uploaded a mobi copy right here. I loved this book, and Colin and Hassan's roadtrip and their bickering and bantering. I still don't understand how that book didn't ended with the two of them deciding they were made for each other, but I would also appreciate any gen adventures with the two of them traveling around. I liked Lindsay and her attitude on life so please, no Lindsay bashing. As I said in my actual request, in order to write Colin, there is a bit of John Cusak hating of ex-girlfriends, but I would appreciate no gratuitous woman bashing.


HIP HOP RPF: Nobody wants Drake and Nicki Minaj to get married like I do. Drake himself comes close, but I want them to be married everywhere. I love them so much, and I would appreciate any stories about their relationship and Drake's inept way of wooing her. Nicki can turn him down forever if you want, but the fond affection of their friendship is my favorite, and I will cry rainbows if you wrote me a story about them

COMMUNITY: Yo, I totally had to include this to ensure I got matched. It doesn't mean I don't love this dumb show like my own child because I DO. I have written for it before, mostly Troy/Abed, but I'd read anything you wrote. Gen capers where the group commits to a terrible decision? In for it. Three characters trapped in a room and forced to have hilarious interactions? Do me on it. Two characters hooking up in silly and/or sexy ways? I'll slice it open and huddle inside it. I don't care anything about Jeff/Britta or Jeff/Annie but I do care about Annie and Britta in any other combination including Annie/Britta, and boy do I want Dean/Jeff songfic to Waking Up In Vegas.

COMMUNITY IS MY LIFE.


THANKS FOR INDULGING ME. ANYTHING YOU WANT TO WRITE IS GOLDEN & I LOVE YOU.

I usually hate it when every post on my flist is the same thing but I am LIVING for this meme, because everyone is taking such time with the answers and it seems so fun!! So here I go as well!!

( give me a number and I'll answer! )

Guys, I am housesitting for brooklinegirl and mrsronweasley and I haven't yet a) set off the alarm and had the police come out b) set anything on fire c) thrown a kegger. WHAT THE HECK!


I suck at posting nowadays, and I am super sorry but I just wanted to tell those of you who didn't pick up on it ---I renamed my twitter to @pullthroughs and locked it for reasons of various shenanigans in RL. FYI! I am mostly located there and tumblr these days.

Have you watched this video of Ten and his cast and crew singing 500 Miles? I think it's old but just surfaced today or yesterday, but either way I let out a cackle at the ood sexy dancing that actually HURT.

Snapshots of Our First Apartment
Troy/Abed (Community)
beta'd by the glorious giddygeek
~2000 words PG

( It started when everything got super weird with Pierce. )

Y'all, I just worked like 54 hours this week and I'm like UGH. I immediately came home, cracked open the box of Franzia I procured and put on Hercules The Legendary Journeys. A lot of you thought I was kidding when I said that was my new fandom, on account of the fact that I was drunk as shit and also with kalpurna, and I often post about exaggerated things when I am drunk as shit and/or with Hannah. But in this case, I was serious. I believe Kevin Sorbo is my new life.

In fact I made a new tumblr and it's called idontunderstandhercules. I have a real tumblr which has 80% less Kevin Sorbo and 100% more reblogs of marksykins and makesomelove and that's at racketstory. I have fully abandoned LJ for tumblr because I suck at fandom and don't understand any of the big fandoms currently. YIKES.

I think there's that meme about not knowing each other and asking questions or whatever but let's be real, y'all know me like a book that's one page long and the page is actually just a sign that blinks OPEN. But if I'm wrong and you have a question ASK IT. I love talking about myself.

For everyone else, here are some posts I meant to write over the last month and didn't in favor of Kevin Sorbo that you can feel free to ask about: my birthday, liz's foot, barnacle and I doing the eastern seaboard, my trip to chicago, my love of downton abbey, my finishing Doctor Who, my finishing a fic called THE SEX CORPS, my being into SGA badfic now, the premiere of Parks and Rec and this email exchange between me and marksykins:

me: 8 minutes in: going to ship dean/john goodman
marks: that's wassssssuP
marks: Also I like that all your community ships involve the dean, like you're secretly the dean.

Friendslist, I know you're watching the Emmy's and I'ma let you finish but this is legit my main fandom atm and I hope you'll respect me for it.

Y'ALL giddygeek, janet_carter and I WENT TO THE BRITNEY SPEARS CONCERT LAST NIGHT AND I HAVE NEVER SEEN MORE DRUNK PEOPLE IN MY LIFE. If you said to someone, Dropkick Murphy concert; Britney Spears concert. Which has more drunks? In my experience of attending one of each, Britney fans are way drunker and way more obnoxious. Who knew???

Nicki Minaj opened and she brought down the damn house. Everyone was screaming in pure happiness and fierceness. Girls in crazy high heels and sparkles putting their number two's up everywhere. I loved every second of it and I would see her again A+++

I almost died my face off when Britney came on because in that moment we were all thirteen and everyone wanted to sing Don't Let Me Be The First To Know with the same passion that they had when they first got that CD but then it real quick got old. Everything you have heard about Britney phoning in performances is goddamn true. She barely made eye contact, barely spoke, and kind of robot like made her way through each routine. If you have seen the VMAs in 2000, you have seen the entire Britney Spears concert. UGH.

I am about to watch Switched at Birth because you guys seem to love it and I love ABC Family channel, so HERE WE GO.

Flist, I know you're all excited about the new x-men movie, and I'ma let you finish but it is 2007 in my house and Doctor Who is the WORST SHOW EVER.

( DOCTOR OF MIDNIGHT PAST (ROSE) )

( DOCTOR OF MIDNIGHT PRESENT (MARTHA) )

( DOCTOR OF MIDNIGHT FUTURE (PONDS) )

I HAVE to get tired soon so that I fall asleep. giddygeek and I keep making deals where we can watch one more episode of television if we go the fuck to sleep right after, and then both of us go to our respective rooms and dick around on the internet so we're super cranky and useless in the morning #winning

BASICALLY I HAVE BEEN ABSENT BECAUSE I COULD NOT GET MORE BORING. No news means good news????

Here is is what is up with me:

-I have been on a month long effort to watch Parks and Recreation. I tried watching it last year when sadface told me to, but S1 turned me off big time. Then it seemed like my twitter frands got into it even more deeply when Adam Scott showed up, and I sure do love Adam Scott. So I tried starting from S2, but every time I would be like GUYS I CAN'T DO THIS, LESLIE AND I ARE NOT MEANT TO BE, someone whose opinion I treasure would be like NO IT GETS GOOD IN TWO EPISODES. This went on until I finished s2, and actually I did end up dying my face off over April and Andy who are like my dreeeeeeeeeeeam couple. SO THANKS GUYS FOR MAKING ME PERSEVERE ON THAT. I am caught up JUST IN TIME for the season finale tonight!!!!!!

-RARE OPINION THAT WILL PROBABLY GET ME SHUNNED: last week's community made me want sooooooooooooo much dean/dean porn. SO MUCH. Like, I want ridiculously filthy smut that ends with the dean of the city college leaving the check on Dean Pelton's nightstand and going "buy your college something pretty". BASICALLY!!!!!!

-Three weeks ago giddygeek and I were hanging out on the couch and she was like "I'm going to watch Doctor Who so be cool or be gone" and I was like WHATEVER I GUESS. And then I actually kind of watched it and it didn't make me want to stab myself in the eye. Then THE SAME EVENTS repeated themselves the week after and the week after that. BASICALLY CUT TO ME BEGGING GIDDY TO WATCH MORE EPISODES, AND ALSO ME CRYING MY FACE OFF WHEN NINE REGENERATED. I honestly can't deal with this development in my life. First of all, I don't even LIKE sci-fi/fantasy, and second of all I find it unbearably tragic that everyone on the screen is temporary. TRAGIC. Unstoppable at this point, though.

IDK, WHAT ELSE IS NEW, GUYS?

Basically all I do is walk around this house yelling about how I need LJ to work so that I can post about MJ, but then when it is working, I squander that moment by reading all the entries/comments/fic I was thwarted from when it was down. Breaking that cycle!

MJ was completely my ideal time. It's like the concomm sat down and was like "what things does Lea like best???" and then was like "DRINKING and TALKING. Let's build a weekend long event for her to do both, nonstop." DREAM.

I modded two panels, one with each of my current girlfriends, and they both went SO well. My twitter panel with drlense was GR8 and everyone was sooooo smart, even if I got shouted down AT MY OWN PANEL for referencing Justin Bieber. GUYS, SHUT IT I HAD SUCH A GOOD POINT.

Then I hosted One True Fics with kalpurna and that was hilarious. Basically we sat in a circle and raised our hands, described a fic trope, and the rest of the room would respond with a gutteral YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS from deep in their id. HILARIOUS. <3 <3 <3 <3

Umm, the rest of the time I was probably drunk. I'm really sorry if I sexually harassed you(mmeguilotn and jocondite), stole your tiara (drlense), assumed you were dead because I hadn't seen you in an hour (shoemaster), stole your drugs (that bridal party in the elevator), hungoverly yelled about my shoes (the entire population of the con that was in the suite on sunday). Or just being terrible (The Boston Public Library).

Why do they let me out in public?????????????????


THE BEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can't wait for 2013! barnacling and mythofthebelle have agreed to mod a panel called Harry Dresden/John Marcone: Has There Ever Been A More Blatant Display Of Love????? Splendiforus.

Okay, I REALIZE my permission to rec anyone anything has been revoked like eighteen times over, because I always get INSANELY emotionally invested in stupid stories, and I just want to share that moment with someone, that moment where you have to CLICK AWAY because you're reveling in the story so much that you actually need to pause and savor before you do something embarrassing. I FRIGGIN LOOOOOOOOOOVE THAT MOMENT, but pretty much every time I try to share it with someone it's like, let me tell you guys about this story I'm reading where Snape adopts Harry/Mark Zuckerberg adopts ten cats/Patrick becomes a llama herder/Rodney lives with whales/WHATEVER and y'all suddenly have better things to do and walk away/sign off im/stop answering comments. YOU GUYS, I JUST WANT TO SHARE MY HAPPINESS.

With that INVITING CAVEAT, let me tell you guys about this fic I am reading. It is COMPLETELY nonembarassing, involves ZERO animals/animal transformations, and no one is pregnant. Why am I reading it you ask? Good question: basically my work filter is arbitrary and cruel and AOOOOOOOOOOOO is like, the only site unblocked, and a lot of people bookmarked it and it was long.

BUT GUYS I WAS SQUIRMING IN MY CHAIR BECAUSE I WAS D.Y.I.N.G. OVER IT. It's the Dresden Files, which if you haven't read the books, let me give you the information you need to read it anyways: Harry is a dick and also a wizard and John Marcone is a mobster who likes kittens and babies. I have to tell you, I was OPPOSED to shipping it because Harry has a LOT of canonical love interests that are damn compelling but this fic has every romantic cliche in the world executed perfectly, and yet she draws it out so you are ANTICIPATING IT. When she tags it as "slow burn" she is not lying. Basically I die, please read it with me and share my happiness. This is not like that time I tried to make everyone read that fic where Harry is a frog for ever. I swear.

other things the road to hell is paved with, Dresden/Marcone 140,000 words.


ANYWAYS, I have finished book 2 of Avatar, and was screaming into a pillow on twitter over Iroh's entire existence. BASICALLY I WANT TO VISIT HIS TEA SHOP/ADVICE COLUMN.

So Friday night I had this huge plan to pamper myself in the empty apartment and make mixed drinks and eat a lasagna I was craving and watch bad tv. Instead I wrote this!

quit your life and stay with me
community: troy/abed
rated r, 2750 words
betaed by giddygeek
none of the major triggers are present in this story. if you have questions about the content, feel free to email me.
read it on AO3

( Abed made the announcement two weeks before the semester ended. )

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FUN FACT: Giddy and I spend most of our time calling Oogie Boogie (the cat who is not Sally and does not have thumbs) Oog Knight and make up a shit ton of stories about Oog dangling people outside of windows and starting beef with every side of the country and just generally threating mayhem if you don't fufil her contract of constant Iams on tap. Did this paragraph enrich your life in any way? No. But in case you were wondering what Giddy and I talk about when we're not debating aging movie stars to bang, it is for sure giving rich, vibrant histories and reasonings to our cats choices. YEEEEEEEEEEEAH.


SOMEHOW in drlense's own living room, brooklinegirl tapped into some UNFORSEEN NOSTALGIA for that period in our lives when we were stalking MULTIPLE SOURCE CODES for information about Pretty Odd, and how we were all DYYYYYYYYING to hear the next five seconds of We're So Starving. Do you guys remember that? Is it not hysterically funny that I actually got hearts in my eyes thinking about Ryan Ross and his bracelets with TRACEY? in SARAH'S house?

Anyway, it led me to digging up all this old stuff I had completely forgotten about. Like theydresstight and viawentztop. LIKE, REMEMBER WHEN THAT WAS A DAILY PART OF OUR EXISTENCE?

No me neither. ANYWAYS, this year so far, I have been dealing with my life by mainlining random seasons of shows that I didn't think I cared about, and IGNORING the backlog of TV I have ALREADY DOWNLOADED, like the last five episodes of Greek, half a season of Parenthood, and I honestly don't think I've tuned into Pretty Little Liars since Martha and I watched it on our snow day. Why? I don't know. I watched all of the netflix available seasons of Grey's Anatomy though! That's definitely a thing I did.

And also AVATAR. Which I had seen episodes of previously, but sporadically and not in any reasonable person order. So clearly what I needed to do with my free time is to watch every episode of Avatar that is on Netflix. Here is something that I surprised myself with: I am such a Sokka!wife. I believe that Sokka and I are destined for each other on the astral plane. DO NOT GET ME WRONG, every character on that show is probably the best in their own ways, and OBVIOUSLY Katara is a gem worthy of adoration but here. is. the. thing. If I were to self evaluate before watching this show, I would have predicted a life long need to wrap Zuko in my arms and tell him everything was going to be okay. You know it's true. It should be Zuko. Zuko is my TYPE. But tonight as I watch Sokka trapped in a hole with only a tiny furry animal to be his friend I realize that I am pretty much carving his name in my notebooks.

NO ONE SPOIL ME. OR JUDGE ME. Well, actually, that ship has probably long sailed, eh?

MJ GIRLS WHO ELSE IS ON THE "I DON'T HAVE A DRESS YET" TRAIN WITH ME? D: D: D: D:

I'm been gloomy for two weeks, I have no money, I can't keep anything down except coffee, I've slept 12+ hours every night this week, I have a yeast infection and this Hawaii 5-0 fic I started is featuring Italian dressing as lube.

Here are somethings that don't make me want to shove my head in a oven:

this article
this poem
this video
this picture
this tweet

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, YOUR TURN.

FIRST OF ALL: I keep wanting to be more into "Born this way" and as of this moment I am still NOT. I appreciated that period of our lives where they were playing it on the radio at the top of every hour because as it turns out, I will sing it on the highway with the passions of a million pent up teenage feelings. But otherwise, I don't have it on repeat or anything. Unless a little girl is singing it while playing piano and making earnest faces. Then I will probably watch it forty seven times in a row and will laugh/respect her youth for days.

SECONDLY. Do I still have to cut FNL spoilers? It's been like FOREVER since it ended but ( feelings )

Also, basically I am a reading machine at work because I have nothing else to do but play words with friends and read e-books, and I just started the Pern books and kept being like

WHAT
IS
HAPPENING


Can I tell you guys something? I would definitely date someone who thought their soul was a dragon. I wouldn't date a furry but I am inordinately fascinated by otherkin. I could listen to people talking about their bipedal wolf mantaray souls for soooooooooooo many dates.

what is this entry???? did i post with this icon just to piss Marksy off? THE WORLD MAY NEVER KNOW.

SOMEONE NEEDS TO YELL PSYCH ASAP

IT'S LIKE BANDOM TAKES EVERYTHING I LOVE AND SHREDS IT.

 [Poll #1675801]

GUYS DO YOU WANT TO HEAR ABOUT MY DAY?????? I told Giddy and Martha that I wasn't going to post about it, but I totally am because I am BOGGLING at how awful it was.


I have been sick for as long as I can remember (AKA SINCE LAST MONDAY). It started out with a fever, congestion and general unwillingness to be upright. It was the absolute worst week for it to happen, as last week I was supposed to have Wednesday off and work Saturday. Well, they called me at 10 on Wednesday and was like LOL JK BE HERE. So I worked EVERY DAY. Around THURSDAY my symptoms abated somewhat, and I started to feel more human, and even was nice to people on Friday and Saturday despite myself. Then Sunday, MY ONLY DAY OFF I started coughing again, and had a sore throat. I am prone to coughing so much my LUNGS INFLAME, causing me to cough HARDER to get air through, so I was like oohhh no. This continued yesterday, where coughing felt like I was ripping something up in my throat. Today, I started getting short of breath while leaving phone messages, so I was like FINE, UNIVERSE. I WILL SEEK MEDICAL ATTENTION.

So thanks to my pal Obama, I'm allowed to stay on my parents insurance, and so did not bother to enroll in my work's hmo because A) it's not that great and my dad's a state employee and B)I get resentful of Medicare some days and want to demand my five bucks back from my paycheck. I probs couldn't handle paying for health insurance until I recover from the unemployment.

So, for the first time since I arrived in MA, I went to my insurance website and did a physician search. OOPS. My insurance only covers CT, NY, NJ, and PA! SUPERB.

It's fine though! Whatever! I looked for and found a free clinic nearby, and waited for my inevitable Z-pack prescription. I donated what I would have paid as a co-pay had I been able to actually see a doctor.

Then I headed off to CVS! Which has serviced my pharmaceutical needs FOREVER. The pharmacist promptly tells me they are OUT OF Z-PACKS, and they don't know when they're going to get them in. She offers to call the next town's CVS, but as it's a bit of a drive, I elect to visit Walgreens which did have them in stock.

THERE, I present my insurance card, the only insurance card I have ever seen, and the Walgreens lady tells me that it doesn't have an RX number and I probably have a pharmacy card. I most certainly do not. I ask her if I can call CVS and get my insurance information from them, she tells me it's worth a shot. After five minutes of being on hold, the CVS person answers and tells me she is not authorized to tell me that information, to have Walgreens call.

I REPEAT, CVS IS NOT AUTHORIZED TO PARROT BACK THE INFORMATION I PROBABLY GAVE THEM TO BEGIN WITH.

I tell the walgreens lady this and offer to hand over the cellphone where the CVS lady is waiting. As if they had planned it, both women chorus "I can't/She probably can't talk on a cellphone."

So the walgreens woman calls on her store phone, and SHE waits five minutes, gets the information, types it up, and tells me it won't go through, that she really just needs the card. I just walk away, and CRY in the parking lot because I can't afford to pay full price and I just want not to be sick I tell this story to my mom, who, like me, hasn't had to present any insurance info to a pharmacist in forever because we've been with CVS so long. She hums and starts looking for another card, and I start driving away, and then I realize that I left my prescription WITH walgreens, and I need to go back and get it, otherwise I would have to go back to the clinic and get a new one. LUCKILY on my way back in, my mom finds a card, and I read it the information to the woman again, and she tells me CVS gave her a number one off, and hands me my prescription.


GUYS, IF I DIDN'T HAVE TOMORROW OFF BECAUSE OF THE STORM, I MIGHT HAVE BLOWN THE STORE APART WITH MY RAGE. MY GOD. ALL I WANT IS LIKE ONE NIGHT OF COMFORTABLE SLEEP. IS THAT NOT TOO MUCH TO ASK? IS THIS HOW I LIVE NOW? IS MY BODY MADE FOR THE PURPOSE OF BEING SICK????


Here is the only good thing about my day: I am currently reading A Year Like No Other which is A BILLION WORDS OF HARRY POTTER GEN which I am pretty sure is somewhere beyond the embarrassingness of how many times I have read Saving Connor, which at least has porn. AYLNO is a Snape-adopts-Harry fic, only it's SOOOOOOOO in character because everyone is a giant douchebag, and I think my favorite line so far is when Snape is like "get out, you blithering moron" and then ruffles his hair and Harry is like "SNAPE AFFECTION IS THE BEST AFFECTION, I GUESS????" The best. Love you Harry Potter longfic.

ALSO UP FOR DISCUSSION: I downloaded the pilot of a show simply because of this summary: Sean and Beverly Lincoln are a happily married English couple who are also the creators of a hit British TV show. Their life seems complete...that is, until a hugely powerful and charismatic US television network president persuades them to move to Los Angeles and recreate their show for American television. Things begin to unravel as soon as Sean and Beverly arrive in L.A. It soon becomes clear that the network executive has never even seen their show. To make matters worse, he insists that they replace their brilliant lead actor, an erudite Royal Shakespeare veteran with...Matt LeBlanc. I can't help it, I lol'd. CAN'T WAIT.

I have an unfortunate habit of adjusting to small negative changes in my life, out of pure laziness, and then not noticing when those changes become larger and larger until all of a sudden I OPEN MY EYES and my life is INTOLERABLE.

Such as when my right mouse button stopped working TWO YEARS AGO and I learned all the windows shortcuts to avoid right clicking.

And then the battery would only really last an hour, then 45 minutes, then a half hour, and then I had to keep it plugged in all the time.

Then a screw came loose in the side of the screen and never went back in right, so the thing made noise when I closed it, and then more noise, and then it really just stopped closing all together. Then the thing the screw used to belong to BROKE.

Cut to kalpurna and giddygeek laughing hysterically when I carted out my laptop which the back cover dangles, the lcd is propped on one side by blank cd case, and which I had to run to plug in before I had wasted the 3 minutes of battery I was allotted.


...Uh, I bought myself a new laptop, guys. I think it was justified.

YULETIDE

I wrote Automated Daydreaming [Troy/Abed] for gigantic, which, let me tell you friends, I was terrified of THAT assignment, because Ceej is the only person other than Hannah, Giddy, and I who I consider a Ph.D of Pete Wentz, and therefore worthy of much admiration and a good yuletide story.

So then I wrote that. I wish I had it in me to write longer stories, but I'm pretty happy with the way that came out. Yay dumb sitcom fics!!!!

I also wrote you are the song which is a VERY short FNL Tami/Coach treat fic for someone who prompted about their first thanksgiving. For writing it at work, and then making misspamela beta it immediately, I am happy with it.

But the fic that person got as their actual story is SO GOOD that I can't even deal. bright and clear is probably my favorite take on Eric and Tami's relationship. ♥


I also really liked the Modern Family fics this year. Particularly the ones about Alex coming out. OBVIOUSLY I loved Marks's (who mocked me for kudo-ing it without recognizing her) tapdancing in a minefield makes me want like FIFTEEN THOUSAND WORDS of Alex and Haley being mean/supportive of each other. UGH I LOVE SISTERS BC I DON'T HAVE ANY.

I also really liked dividing every question 'til the questions are complete despite the fact that it has SUPER WEIRD spacing issues that I just want to fix. It's pretty much everyone's reactions to Alex coming out, and I think my favorite is this.

When she tells grandpa (and she doesn’t want to, because this feels like a total over-share, but her uncles insisted she start now, or something), Claire has his elbow in a tight grip, and Mitch is muttering things like, “No jokes about k.d. lang. No asking if she’s going to cut off her hair. No-”

“Oh, geez,” her grandpa sighs, pulling her into a hug.

“I love you,” he says into her ear. “And if anyone tries to give you trouble, you just let me know.”

YESSSSSSS.


Your turn, fronds! Rec me something!!!!! PREFERABLY ABOUT SITCOM HOOKUPS OR SUPERADOLESCENTS WITH FEELINGS.

I should post about approximately forty seven things today, such as Yuletide, both the stories I wrote and the gr8 story I received, my absolute shitshow of new year's eve with my beautiful, wonderful besties, or the absolute psychotic break I suffered when I got back to the apartment that kalpurna was no longer residing in, but instead I am posting to tell you the absolute best line in any fic in any fandom that I have encountered.

Mr. Wayne throws his hands in the air. "Christ, Luthor, I'm only going to say this once, so listen carefully: not everything in the world is about your break-up with Superman."